Thursday, December 5, 2013

Sophia's Cancer - A BUT GOD Story

I realized something yesterday.  It was a major revelation about Sophia's cancer.  The thing about seasons of suffering, the lessons don't always come immediately.  The Lord, in His infinite wisdom, uses ordinary days to drop bombs of understanding into your mind.  I was with the girls at swim lessons when it happened, so you just never know when a daisy-cutter of divine wisdom is going to hit.

First, because you stood by us during Sophia's cancer treatment, I want to share this very personal element of my recent prayer life with you.  I've been praying for several months now (with an extra-helping of faith from the Holy Spirit) that the "spot" or scar from her tumor, will be gone.  Actually, I've been praying that from her diagnosis.  But lately, I've been praying it will be gone by her next round of scans - in January

You can not imagine how hard it is for me to write this to you.  My hands are shaking as I type.  I am beyond doubt, but saying it out loud, on the internet, for the whole world to read when I've barely admitted to anyone requires a level of faith that is breath-taking.  It is only in His strength I can keep typing.

I got up early this morning to pray and study, as usual, but the Lord led me to go lay down with Sophia.  She's been a parenting challenge for me lately, another rough edge the Lord is smoothing out.  I didn't want to drop my regularly scheduled plans with Him for time with her, but I did and it was sweet. 

(When are sleeping children NOT sweet?)

Listening to her breathe, my thought from yesterday came back.  Whatever you want to call him: the enemy, Satan, the devil, the Accuser...he meant to use cancer to kill my daughter.

I don't know why it's taken so long for me to grasp this.  In our first meeting with her oncologist, over three years ago, she told us they don't know why kids get cancer.  Well, duh!!  Jesus and Peter knew over two-thousand years ago.  They said Satan is a thief and a lion, respectively.  Thieves steal and lions kill.  My girl, like every precious little one, has a great, Godly purpose in her future.  And the enemy wanted nothing more than to stamp it out early.  He wanted her dead!

That makes me SO mad.  Wait for it though, there is a but coming.

In Scripture, especially in Paul's letters, you see the words: But God.  It denotes a transition into timeless, eternal truth about our Father, who is large and in charge.  There are many But God's in my life, perhaps none bigger than Sophia.  What the enemy meant for death, God not only brought back to life, He restored.  He gave her perfect health, she doesn't even have the allergies she had before her diagnosis and zero eye problems.

What a gift!  What a miracle!  I don't know why He did it for us but not for others.  I just know that she is marked by cancer no longer.  To that end, I claim her spot is gone and God is using this time between revealing it in the natural to get me ready.  Ready, for when the doctor walks in with an astonished look on her face saying, "It's gone.  We never thought it would go away completely because that isn't what these tumors do.  But it's gone."

Then I will praise the Lord.  Then I will tell her how I prayed.  Then I will tell her that Jesus loves her.

Mixed with my fear, in fact, greater than my fear, is assurance.  That's what faith is, according to the writer of Hebrews.  Faith is the assurance of things we don't yet see.  It's confidence in Christ, in whom I've placed all my hope. (Hebrews 11:1)

This world has many cancers.  There is, clearly, cancer of the body.  There are also cancers of the mind, of the heart and of the spirit.  Our enemy uses them to destroy us.  He doesn't want us to live out God plans. 


It is not God's desire for anyone to walk around diseased and broken, in any area of life.  Jesus came to save the sick!  I am more convinced than ever God wants only good for us because that is what He is - GOOD.  Sometimes, like in Sophia's case, we have to wait to see it.  It takes time in the natural realm to reveal what He has already accomplished.

All suffering with any type of cancer of body, mind, heart or spirit is not what the Lord intends.  We struggle so much with why He lets it happen, why bad things happen to good people, or if it is punishment for our sins.

Let me just clear that up.  Bad things are the exerted will of the enemy to kill us, destroy our faith and annihilate our purposes in God.

I'm tired of seeing him win.  I'm tired of giving him that power, in any area of my life, but especially when it comes to my children.  What the enemy means for harm, God transforms into good.  (Gen 50:20)  The Lord uses these bad things to save many lives.  I know people were saved into faith, or greater faith, by Sophia's story.

Her story is not finished.  For now, I'm waiting on another chapter to be completed so I say that the enemy can't have our kids.  He can't have us, we are already spoken for.

I don't know what kind of physical, mental or spiritual cancer you or someone you love is suffering with today, but I know Jesus is more than willing to heal.  I know it is available only in Him.  I hope you will ask the Holy Spirit to help you believe, so you can go forward in the power of His love for you.  I want you to have unexplainable joy in the middle of your circumstances, like we did and continue to have.  Whatever you are facing, hold on to one thing today, no matter what anyone tells you.  When you are in Christ, He writes the story and your story isn't finished. 

It will be a happy ending.  Just remember Sophia and remember BUT GOD.