Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Foxes in my hen house

I read a devotional yesterday about letting "little foxes" from Song of Solomon 2:15 get into the vineyard of your marriage. ("Catch for us the foxes, the little foxes that ruin the vineyards, our vineyards that are in bloom.") It was about having a strong Christian marriage by forgiving your spouse for an offense immediately, almost as you've been offended. Of course, that came into practical use last night but that's another story.

There are other little foxes that I'm dealing with too. Feelings of insecurity, uncertainly and stress about our future. Annoyance with my youngest for all the drama and whining. Sick of school routine and wariness about summer routine. Worry over friends dealing with major prayer concerns. Physical tiredness and lots of accomplish. Need to figure out what to make for dinner from a bare pantry, with no desire to go to the store. The little things that creep in and steal my joy.

Most logical people might chalk all this up to hormones/PMS. Or my emotional issues might be related to the fact that I'm still recovering from exhaustion. Or maybe the stress of life in ambiguity is again weighing me down. I feel the need to escape, to go on vacation, to run away.

Then I am reminded that I am not a fox hunter. I am not a hunter at all. I'm a sheep and the same Shepherd who can protect me from the roaring lion can also protect me from these little foxes that have crept into my mental hen house. He can lead me beside the still waters, away from that dark place of waiting.

Only He can complete the verses that proceed the "little foxes" verse. Song of Solomon 2:14 & 16:

(14) My dove in the clefts of the rock,
in the hiding places on the mountainside,
show me your face,
let me hear your voice;
for your voice is sweet,
and your face is lovely.

(16) My lover is mine and I am his;
he browses among the lilies.

He is my mountainside. He will show me His face, speak to me, sing songs of praise over me. He is mighty to save and He is mine, holding on to me.

He is not worried - He is taking a walk in His garden and that is where I need to find Him. I don't need to sit and breathe in this nasty chicken coop, letting these little foxes tear me to pieces bit by bit. I need to get some fresh mental air - let Him renew my mind and restore my soul.

So, that is my choice today. I choose redemption and renewal in His Word and through His Truth. I'm going to go for a walk with Him and let Him remind me who I am to Him and that He is firmly in control of everything. Who knows what I will face tomorrow, but I will let Him take me away from the hen house today. After all, tomorrow as enough little foxes of its own.

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